Madison fans braved the frigid temperatures on Saturday, January 7 in anticipation of seeing their favorite teams and skaters warm their hearts with a night of fast-paced and hard-hitting roller derby.
Unholy Rollers 207, Reservoir Dolls 159 (stats)
That didn’t take long, as the Unholy Rollers steadily built a lead over their opponents the Reservoir Dolls with big jams from Gertrude Awakening and rookie Toast. Ten minutes into the game they held a 40-24 lead. Tenacious D got the Res Dolls back into the game with a 15-point jam to bring her team within a point of overtaking the lead. Rookie jammer (recently returned from a stint with Rose City in Portland) Chairman Mau put the Res Dolls back on top 42-41, grinding out three points on the next jam. Three jams later, she extended her team’s lead with blocking help from LipsMmacker, Full Frontal Jewdity, and rookie Auntie-Matter.
The Unholies’ blockers stood united to keep their team from falling too far behind, though.Tango De Muerte, Hanna Cuffs, and rookie Kel Fire Warrior sprung jammer Fang Dangled to put the Unholies ahead 79- 68 with five minutes left in the half. Ladie Who-Ha narrowed the deficit by scoring ten of her team-high 49 points to bring the Res Dolls back, and Tenacious D put them ahead on the last jam on the half. The period ended with the Reservoir Dolls clinging to a 96-91 lead.
The opening minutes of the second half saw the Unholy Rollers bounce back with Fang Dangled getting 14 of her game-high 67 points to put her team ahead, while her teammates held their opponents to a total of four points in the first five minutes of the period. Ladie Who-Ha got the Res Dolls back in the game with a 16-point effort, narrowing the gap to a 122-116 advantage for the Unholies.
The defense for the Unholies took over then, holding their opponents scoreless for four jams while their jammers worked to addto the Unholies'lead. Fang Dangled and Gertrude Awakening came up big on a couple of jams to extend their lead further. With six minutes remaining in the game, they held a 168-139 advantage. Tenacious D and Mouse fought through the pack for 12and eight point rallies to try to spark the Res Dolls into a comeback, but Gingah Snap peeled off 22 points on a power jam to clinch the win fro the Unholies. In their first victory since the 2015 season, the Unholy Rollers vanquished the Reservoir Dolls 207-159.
Vaudeville Vixens 186, Quad Squad 141 (stats)
The second bout of the night was a rematch of the 2016 Championship game. The hungry Vaudeville Vixens and their fans were eager to see a different outcome this time around, but Quad Squad jumped out to an early lead behind jams from Hammer Abby and Brokeback Jac. Seven minutes into the game, Team Green was up 32-14. Over the next seven minutes, however, Vixens defenders held the Quad Squad scoreless while efforts from Jostlin’ Hell and Black Velvet brought the two teams even.
Scoring was hard to come by for both teams for the remainder of the half. Jams yielded few points for either team, with the exception of two Quad Squad power jams that got them some breathing room, putting them ahead 60-47. Black Velvet ripped through the pack for 10points to close the gap, and Blanche Devereauxxx put the Vixens over the hump with a four point jam to close the half. As the teams vacated the track for halftime, the Vaudeville Vixens held a razor-thin 61-60 advantage in a low-scoring defensive onslaught.
It was anybody’s game, and the Quad Squad started the second half intent on staking their claim. They took back the lead on a jam by Darkhorse and defense by blockers Allie Gator, Crystal Ice, and rookie Ahna Roll. The Vixens took the advantage right back on Shantastic McAwesome’s 14-point scramble. Hammer Abby tried to right the ship by scoring 10 of her team-high 56 points on the next jam. Black Velvet came out of the penalty box and scored 13 points of her own during the same jam to keep the Vixens in the lead 89-84.
The Quad Squad tried to keep it close, but couldn’t quite keep things together defensively. Jostlin’ Hell scored 23 of her game-high 62 points two jams later with help from blockers Darling Nikki and Feminine Hijinx. Eight minutes later she scored 13 more. With four minutes left in the game, the Quad Squad was down 148-137, still within reach with plenty of time to pull ahead. On the next jam, with Darkhorse serving two sentences in the penalty box, Shantastic McAwesome glided through for a 27 point power jam to put the game out of reach. The contestended with the Vaudeville Vixens victorious over the Quad Squad for the first time sincethe 2013 season, with a score of 186-141.
Things just get more exciting with the third game of the season, coming February 18 to the Exhibition Hall at the Alliant Energy Center! Get your tickets early, as we'll be in just one hall for this double header and it WILL sell out!
- recap by Peter Rabid
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